FireFlies
by lazywriter123
Summary: Spencer was happily married and was looking towards a wonderful future until a terrible tragedy occured. With his heart in pieces and with little hope of healing, his friends and a woman he meets has to help him from fading away.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own Criminal Minds

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Introduction

Spencer married Maggie about four years ago. They were the best of friends and loved each other indefinitely. Her bright eyes, soft blonde hair and smile made his heart do flips. Despite the happiness of being a married couple and having tons of friends to be around, Maggie always wanted to have a baby. So for about four they went to the doctor and tried to have a baby, until finally Maggie tests came out positive. The team was so proud of him and couldn't wait to see they baby.

They made a nursery and made sure their child would have everything he or she would ever want and need. Maggie glowed all throughout her pregnancy; she was healthy and had the air of motherhood about her. But it was when she had to go to the hospital to finally deliver the baby that everything went completely wrong.

Spencer was forced out of the delivery room when the doctors noticed something was wrong with Maggie. Spencer waited outside and paced around the waiting room. That's when his teammates came to visit. They were shocked to see Spencer in tears and pacing.

"Reid what happened" asked JJ. Spencer told them that something was wrong with Maggie. After about another twenty minutes, the doctor finally came into the room.

Spencer stood up and asked his doctor if his wife and child were alright.

The doctor gave a sad sigh, "I'm sorry Mr. Reid…we lost Maggie…the strain from the labor and the bleeding was too much on her body…I'm so sorry."

Spencer was frozen, he couldn't even breathe. Suddenly he collapsed to the floor in tears. His friends helped him up onto a chair and let him greave for a bit until he was able to ask about the baby.

The doctor gave another sad sigh, "Your son is ok…but he is very weak…were not sure if he will make it…"

Spencer gave another sob in absolute despair. "Can I see him?"

The doctor nodded and his friends helped him into the room. There, his little son was lying, his breathing labored and his body was so small.

Spencer gently picked up the baby; he noticed that the infant was so cold and wrapped in a soft blanket.

He held his son to his face and kissed his forehead and cheek. "Even if you don't live…I still love you so much…I wanted to call you Jason but…Maggie wanted you to be called Zach…so that's your name. Zachary Reid."

Spencer spent all day and all night with his son. He fed him, changed him and let the doctors do his tests to see if he would make it or not. When his friends begged him to eat or at least go home, Spencer refused.

After one more day, Zachary died.

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	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Criminal Minds

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TWO YEAR AND A HALF YEARS LATER:

Spencer sat at his desk, it was well past nine pm but Spencer worked anyway. Since he lost his wife and child, Spencer basically shut down. He barely talked, went out with his team, and spent hours working. His friends were heartbroken when they say their friend slowly slip away.

Still Spencer kept a picture of his wife and a small picture of his infant son. He would gaze lovingly at the pictures; he wanted so desperately to see his wife and to have his child back. He felt it wasn't far that his future family had to be taken from him in one mighty swoop. He almost went back to his drugs…but he stopped himself. He knew his wife wouldn't want him to destroy himself. So he threw out the drugs.

He was just a shell of what he used to be. Sure he still worked hard on the cases and did what was expected of him, but that was it. Everyone tried to get him to talk about his feelings, at least a little, but Spencer wouldn't budge.

His team had no idea what to do. Even the psychologists was helpless, Spencer wouldn't talk to them either.

One day, Spencer was walking home from work when he saw a woman struggling with some boxes. At first Spencer was going to just keep walking but then she turned to him.

"Excuse me sir, can you help me with these boxes. I just need to put them in this truck."

Spencer turned to her and silently took some of the boxes and put them in the truck. "Thank you, I just moved into the neighborhood. Do you live near here?"

"Yes…a few blocks down…"

"So how's the city life here?"

"…fine…"

"My names Katy" she said as she extended her hand to shake his.

Spencer stared at her hand for a moment then shook her hand, "Spencer…"

"Cool, I'm working at the diner across the street, come by and we can chat."

Spencer looked at her and finally said, "I'll come tomorrow during my lunch break…"

Katy smiled and waved to him good-bye.

As Spencer walked home, he felt something he hadn't felt in a long time. His heart beat had quickened and he felt…warm.

It was so strange to feel these emotions again…but he quickly stopped himself. No thinking about it. That was a rule me had for himself a while back.

No emotions.

No thinking about her or him.

He had to stick with those rules…if he wanted to survive.

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